What’s in a name?

If you were ever lucky enough to drive the mid-nineties Impala SS then you know what it’s like to drive a truly ironic car. No spell check needed I did mean ironic and not iconic, although some SS-owners would understandably argue for the latter. I say ironic because it is a large and heavy car that feels like your grandfather’s Cadillac while cruising down the highway, but step on the throttle and the extra weight disappears and suddenly you’re engulfed by the cushy leather seats. The particular one I drove had carbon-fiber interior trim and I couldn’t help but laugh that the trim was the area they wanted to save weight, never mind the 850-pound doors or helipad of a hood. I remember that the car felt so large that I had the urge to yell when talking to the person next to me, but yet its size was flung forward by the large amount of torque and posi-lock diff. It also had an LT1 Corvette engine with 4-wheel disc brakes and stiffened suspension, of which all could have fit into the trunk that was large enough to sub as a living room should you ever need to remodel yours. Ironic? Yes. Unbelievably fun to drive? You bet. But then the Impala ran away from home and by the time it came back it was neutered and had its emission shots.

At that time RWD sedan platforms were falling off the face of the earth and you had to buy foreign cars for the entire family to enjoy sliding sideways on the way to grandma’s house. Thankfully (sort of)  American car companies were forced to build better automobiles if they wanted to continue eating. That led to Cadillac growing some cojones and adding the term “Nürburgring” to their vocabulary. GM didn’t stop there either; they brought us an Australian goody repackaged as the Pontiac G8 GXP, which in Holden means “fun for the whole family”. Like the Impala SS the G8 didn’t last long but not to fear because we’re getting them both back, sort of. It won’t be called an Impala or a G8 or a Commodore, it’s called the SS. Again no spell check needed as it is just SS. No Chevelle SS, Camaro SS, or Impala SS and that means it is the first time that the SS package isn’t a package at all, but a model. Like the G8 GXP it will have over 400 horsepower and 4-doors. Like the Impala SS of old, it too will have a Chevrolet badge and a large trunk. But to me there is something missing…maybe it’s in the name? I know with confidence that GM has no worry that the SS name will resonate well with key demographics but I can’t help but see a missed opportunity. Look at it this way, we are in an age of nostalgia, we love the history and nameplates of the Charger, Challenger, Mustang, Camaro, Dart and so on. Why not bring the Chevelle or Malibu back? Or dare I say Bel-Air or Biscayne? Now before you crucify me for thinking about bringing back the Bel-Air name just consider the different packages that could come from it, including a Bel-Air Nomad based off of the Holden Commodore Sportwagon. It’s just a thought and it might be a bad one but these ideas come from the same place that housed my disappointment when the new Camaro ZL-1 wasn’t a Z-28. Maybe I’m thinking too old school here and not focusing on the really good news; GM seems to be getting back on track and building things we actually want to drive. After all the SS will have a fast engine, Brembo brakes, and decent looks. Plus it’s already being ironic, because the car that is now named after the famous performance package…will only come fully loaded with no other package or options.

Photo by ajbatac via http://www.flickr.com/photos/ajbatac/7845809962/